Monday, March 28, 2011

Roubaix? Roubaixes? Roubu?

You see, here's the thing. That pain in your knee isn't going away on it's own. I suppose it might if you'd quit jamming it up climbs like the Powerline at Ohill and Cabin Lake at BRS. But it's race season, and let's face it, you can't help yourself.

So maybe Doctor Geoff can.
He had a mighty fine time at Blue Ridge School himself. 2nd in Sport, behind only the manchild Dewitt DeZirkle in a tight fight. Kev29er, quite typically, took the SS win despite getting a little Christopher Columbus with the navigation. And other accolades? Still waiting to be revealed as the results aren't out and about just yet. But I'm told that everyone made it out alive, and that's a big collective victory at a race like the Ridge on a snow day like Sunday.

What now? Well, if you're a hard man for the Spring Classics, you and your 28c road tires are in luck. Back-to-back Roubaix (roubaixes? Roubaixeses? Roubu? )
braking with your face. not just for amateurs anymore.

First, the Harris-Roubaix, perhaps the most famous of the local Roubaix, and dare I say mainstream when it comes to the underground dirt gravel disorga-races of today, will seek to mimick the pain of the real Paris-Roubaix on April 10th. Details can be found here. As a certified DNF last year, I can assure you that it's sort of thing you'd be into if filling your chamois with gravel and mashing some steep stuff all day is your thing. And I can also recommend a full suspension mountain bike. Enjoy yourself.

Slightly less well known, but with better prose and EastnotWest, the Ferry-Roubaix seems to somehow be in its 3rd annum already without most folks having every really noticed the first two. April 17th, and hosted by FOTP The Rooster hisself, you can find all of the details (along with fashion tips and obscure Star Wars references) on his blog. But to really do it justice, I'll quote the Rooster here:

"All I can tell you is when the going gets tough, and the road gets rough, you are out on course alone and don't know if you are 10 minutes up or 20 minutes back, and no matter how many times you wipe it off there is perpetually a droplet of low-viscosity snot hanging from your nose, and every sip of air is like inhaling sulfuric acid, and you don't know when the last time was you actually saw one of those ?????-colored arrows - are you gonna reach down and grab that bidon full of courage, take a big-ass gulp and stand up on the pedals, or are you gonna stop, unwrap your pasty power bar of shame, and wait on the roadside to pile up in the broom truck? Your call, young Skywalker, your call..."

I'm not sure what all of that really adds up to, but The Route does, indeed, appear to be 125 miles long. That's a lot of Star Wars references and fashion tips. And you see what I mean about the prose.

Sign me up. And by that I mean rumor my attendance, see what the mighty Ken Tank and Big John have in store for that day, and hastily change the subject and move on if it all doesn't fall into place.

A little education in the ways of the Roubaix, if you're diggin' it.

And some action, jackson.

Or you could sit on the couch at home and watch the real deal on Versus on April 10th. Or you could just race Hilbert. Not as exciting now that we're 3 races in the bag already now is it. But still a good time and worth doing.

Happy trails, and a happy two-fer, by the way. If you like the new rock work on the dam loop at Walnut, that was me.

officially now the worst best handsaw of all time.

If you don't, it was someone else.

It all leads, where else, up, up, up.

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