Thursday, January 30, 2014

Ten Day Forecast

Well, the Ten-Day Forecast - which now almost includes the Pantani Ride - is in.

You can find that here, I think.  Although if you're reading this tomorrow, that's actually yesterday's forecast. Or if you've gone back in time to read it yesterday, it's tomorrow's.   No, wait, come to think of it, I think that puppy will dynamically update (whatever that means.)  So if you read it in, say, July 31, 2017 it's the 10 day forecast for the next week and a half in August of that same year, assuming we haven't bombed ourselves off the planet by that time, which is 50/50 at best.

My point here:  don't read that shit.  They don't know.

But if you're really curious because you're trying to make a tire selection for The Pantani Ride from here -10 days out - or maybe you just love the drama, then I'll allow Kev29er to chime with his salacious rumors:

From Kev29er:
I hear talk of blizzards on Pantani weekend.
 There was some crazy future-casting image on facebook...maybe bullshit, but someone said it married up w/ the almanac...also maybe bullshit, but accuweather long term IS calling for snow on friday-saturday.
 Maybe it could be one for the books. Sounds epic.

Let me explain something about the 10-day forecast.  It's a lot like 10-day foreplay.  It pretty much has no bearing whatsoever on action 10 days from now.  Show me a forecast for the next 20 minutes, and I'll buy into the fact that you might score, or we might have a blizzard.  But 10 days out?  Come on.  No one has that kind of stamina.

Well, maybe not no one.  Captain America did check in with the local snowfall totals from Superduperstorm Leon on Jan 28th:

From: Captain America
About an inch. It is crazy weather around here. Ready for spring r u? Unfortunately, I won't be making the Pantani this year due to duty at the school over at Snowshoe, but be assured that I will be training over there. The fears that others might have had about me on Simmons Gap can rest in peace for another year.

Now THIS is news worthy of your attention.  Namely because:
1)  There's not so much snow out there atop the pop that the next 3 days of fine wine and sunshine won't melt the whole thing out, thus resetting the ruler to 0".
2)  You don't have to worry about the Captain running you over while you're climbing up Simmons when he's already on his way down it.  That's humiliating and debilitating, and now, luckily, out of the question.

And if you're really worried about the weather, worry less.  We've got Jim Cantore on our side, after all:

The badassery of Cantore no-look kneeing someone in the nuts aside for a just monent, there is something familiar about him that I can't place.  The toughness?  The resolve?  The ears?
I can't forecast the weather, but I can spot long lost brothers when I see them.
Mother nature, you are officially on notice:

You mess with Pantani, and Jim Cantore will fuck you up up up.

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