Monday, February 9, 2015

The wrong day IS the right day

So, yesterday was nice, right?  I went for a road ride wearing just shorts and a t-shirt, and the mercury went all crazy, and by the time I figured out what was happening I was riding up Mission Home and it was like 90 degrees or whatever, and I was pouring sweat like a toilet in the summer when the AC quits.  It is days like yesterday when they happen to happen in the month of February that act as verification that not all is lost here on Planet Earth.  Yet.
Cantore predicts Pantani DOOM!
Which brings me to next Sunday, the 15th, which of course you know is Pantani day, and at 11 AM, I've been told by the meteorological experts that the gun will go off here at the Rancho Relaxo and temperature will be well down into the 20s, and perhaps as low as 9 degrees at the top of the pop with 30 mph winds.

I've seen it worse.  And it was awesome.

Still, keeping in mind that this is still a full 7 days out, and no one actually knows anything 7 days out, and it's probably not going to be so bad once you get rolling and blah blah blah, I'm forced to face the fact that B-Slow literally asked me a month ago to run the Pantani yesterday vs. the 15th because it would have been better aligned with the collegiate racing schedule, and I told him to pound sand.  And it would have been amazing.  So as it stands, you can blame all of your lost digits, icy crashes, and whatever other woes befall you on the 15th on my lack of support of collegiate racing.

I am sorry about all that.

But look, dig into the trenches with me here for a moment Pantani brothers and sisters, and cast yourself into the predicted future atop Brokenback mountain on the 15th where it's 9 degrees and the wind is howling, and you're 3 hours into it, and you're pondering life, and thinking about becoming a vegan, and wondering why the fuck you keep doing this to yourself every year, and what would this be like if you'd just committed to the road bike, and whatever else goes through your mind when you're hoofing it up that son of a bitch in the freezing cold, and stop: remind yourself - mid trudge - that this is exactly what Pantani did.  Years and years of training on grades this steep in conditions this bad because, despite all of the things he lacked, he had an overabundance of heart.

Wise or not, Pantani always seemed to go for it anyway.

There's also a pretty good chance you'll get to see what Jon C's bare ass looks like when it's that cold, so that'll be worth something.

OK, so stay tuned, try not to panic, and we'll monitor the weather forecast, discuss the Vegas odds of victory for a certain runner-up from last year, preview the blinged out bikes of all the podium contenders, and generally behave like we're fucking psyched to do this awful thing to ourselves again on Sunday.

The wrong day IS the right day.

Up, up, up.

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