THE BEAVER HAS GROWN.
9 and 1/4 miles per lap, dedicated to chewing on your legs. Sunday, April 29th.
Before we get to the nitty gritty, I will here deposit all of the bizarro Beaver attack news that you people have sent me over the last year. I don't know what it says about me, or you, or the world at large that this blog is now the de facto authority on Beaver aggression. But here you are:
http://worldnewsdailyreport.com/canadian-trapper-survives-brutal-sexual-assault-by-200-pound-beaver/
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2307572/Beaver-attack-Fisherman-killed-BEAVER-tried-photo-lake-Belarus.html
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/world/2013/04/11/newser-beaver-kills-man/2074145/
https://www.citizen-times.com/story/news/local/2016/07/11/possibly-rabid-beaver-attacks-paddle-boarder-beaver-lake/86942648/
I think the course is a lot longer than it was last year. Much of the new stuff is also way, way better, having been successfully beaten into submission by the army of junior racers we have around these parts.
You can sign up here.
Orrrr...you can wait, watch the weather, and then sign up on race day, thus ruining Marky Mark's entire weekend.
Of note, there will be not one, but TWO demo trucks on site that day, dishing out the toys in exchange for a temporary glance at your personal credit card. The Pivot Demo truck, in fact, I can see parked from where I am typing this right at this very moment. But those new Trek's with the Re-Active bizarro valve, the ones from outer space, won't show up until the weekend.
Someone dropped me a note, mentioned how old I have gotten, then asked a great question:
"Can I just race a demo bike?"
Good thinking. No sense riding the Beaver and taking a beating on your own bike when you can just ride a demo bike and blame it for your lack of talent and winter lethargy. The answer: I don't know. Maybe the powers that be at Trek and Pivot will chime in here with their thoughts on allowing you to semi-puke on their demonstration carbon bits.
It would be useful, after all, to get a sense of how well the vomit flows down the top tube at high speed. Hashtag, aerovomit. You read it hear first.
Those CAMBC burgers: Easily digestible. For a good cause. But do they adhere to carbon if pre-chewed?
One way to find out.
Sign up, Show up, get up up up.
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